The Irrational Fear of Posting

Why Hitting ‘Share’ Feels Like Jumping Off a Cliff

I can stand on a stage, facilitate a leadership workshop, or coach a senior team without breaking a sweat. But give me a LinkedIn post to write, and suddenly completely unsure of myself. My finger hovers over the “Share” button as if it’s the trigger to a catapult.

Will anyone care? Too obvious? Too vulnerable? Too 'expert'? Too much? Too little?

I’ll rewrite, delete, and quietly close the app. And just like that, another perfectly harmless post joins the graveyard of 'drafts I’ll definitely publish someday'.

The irony of confidence and visibility

Here’s the thing: I’m not actually scared of posting. I’m scared of being judged.

It’s an irony I see everywhere in my work with leaders and professionals. We’re confident in our skills, respected in our roles, even admired for our calm under pressure, but when it comes to visibility, something can shift. Whether it’s speaking up in certain forums, networking, holding our own in high stakes environments or posting on social media, we can hesitate.

We tell ourselves it’s about not wanting to show off, seem arrogant or not having enough time, but often it’s something quieter and deeper - the discomfort of exposure or judgment.

Humans judge - and that’s okay

The truth is, people will judge. It’s what humans do. I guess that's why I hesitate so much! As a coach I'm privileged to be let in on people's self talk ALL the time and we all do it, so I'm acutely aware!

We’re wired to evaluate, compare, and form opinions, it’s part of how we make sense of the world. For every person who might roll their eyes at your post, there’s likely another who quietly nods in recognition, takes courage from your words, or feels less alone because you dared to share them.

The goal isn’t to avoid judgment, it’s to remember that it cuts both ways. The negative ones sting, yes, but the positive ones inspire, affirm, and connect. The silence is also data.

The leadership link: being seen vs being visible

Visibility is often perceived as self-promotion, when in reality it’s about connection and credibility. It’s how people understand what we care about, what we stand for, and how we lead.

In today’s world, where leadership extends beyond the meeting room and office space to the digital world and virtual networks, being visible isn’t optional - it’s part of how trust is built. Yet that doesn’t make it easy.

There’s something uniquely confronting about showing up. You can’t hide behind your title, your role, or your PowerPoint deck. It’s just… you.

And that’s precisely why it matters. You are important. What you have to say matters.

Fear, vulnerability, and the human brain

The fear feels irrational, but it’s not imaginary. Our brains are wired to avoid social risk. To the nervous system, being judged online or in person can feel as threatening as being rejected by the tribe. No wonder we hesitate.

The body doesn’t distinguish between 'I might be eaten by a sabre-toothed tiger' and 'Someone might not like my leadership reflection on LinkedIn'. Both trigger that subtle cocktail of anxiety, overthinking, and procrastination.

When we recognise that, it becomes easier to meet the fear with a little compassion - not mock it, not power through it, but understand it.

A reframe for leaders

What if visibility isn’t vanity, but service? This is the reframe I've been working with.

Every time we share a thought, an experience, or a perspective, we create a ripple of learning. We give others permission to think, reflect, or even disagree - all of which are vital for collective growth.

And what if posting online, or speaking up generally , isn’t a performance, but a practice? A way to stretch our comfort zone, to model courage, and to humanise leadership in an era that desperately needs more of it.

A few reflection prompts for the hesitant (myself included)

• When does your “fear of showing up” kick in most - and what story are you telling yourself in that moment?

• What might change if you saw visibility as generosity, not self-promotion?

• What if your voice helps someone in that moment?

• Whose learning or confidence might you be holding back by staying silent?

  
  

Still hovering, but so much braver

I won’t pretend I’ve conquered the fear. I still hover over the button. I still wonder about how my post will be received but it's getting easier. And, importantly I'm walking my talk and holding myself to account.

I now see that hesitation as a signal - not of weakness, but of care. It means I want my words to land well, to be useful, to contribute something of value to someone.

And maybe, that’s exactly what makes it worth posting.